Oh, Sir Weasley!
by lostmidtranslation
Summary: Because Fred always wanted to be her knight in shining armour... And Katie gives him every chance. Fratie oneshot, because they're lovely together. T for Lang & innuendo. FWKB indeed


_Disclaimer: Anything you recognise, was created, invented or designed by JK Rowling. I just enjoy Making Katie and Fred fall rather deeply in love._

………………………………_......_

_**A/N A Fratie oneshot . I love these. They make me happy, and I love them… and yeah. **_

_**Enjoy it! This was a VERY much lot of hard work =D**_

_**A huge hug! for those who manage to pick up on the multiple Douglas Adams & Hitchhiker's Guide… references : )**_

_**Please review!!!**_

_**-x-x-x-**_

_**Katie**_

"It's a bottle of water, Fred."

"But surely, milady, you'll want it in a flagon, or a chalice, will ye not?"

I looked at George for an explanation. He simply shrugged and turned back to trying to scrawl eighteen inches of Transfiguration homework in thirty-seven minutes exactly. Fred's behaviour the past few weeks had totally thrown me off, he had been… well, he'd been treating me like a princess, and it was severely freaking me out.

"When did you get hit in the head, Fred?" Angelina, subtle as ever, sat down opposite us, holding a goblet of pumpkin juice out in front of her. It was a few drops away from overflowing and my eyes widened as I watched it continue to fill, sloshing over onto my half-finished transfiguration essay. I swore and dried it quickly, "Er, Kitty, do you know how to cut a dilution spell off?" I complied with her request, and she sipped the drink lightly, trying not to spill anything else. "Thank you, Kits."

I rolled my eyes at the ridiculous nickname, which Angelina had decided upon purely because my name had roughly the same phonetics as the word, and I liked cats. Well _mi-fucking-aow_. I did complain to her, but the nickname just stuck.

"Personally, Katie, milady, I don't understand your horrific disdain at the name." Fred had caught the eye roll. "I think it's becoming. You, of course, have a lovely little pus-" The resounding _slap_ that came from me backhanding his cheek could be heard from the staff table at the other end of the hall, and within a second, McGonagall had appeared in front of me.

She looked between us, I was sitting there, still looking disgusted as hell, and Fred was massaging his cheek where I'd smacked him, hard. There was a red, hand shaped mark on his face, and I sort of felt guilty at hitting him - I hadn't meant to do it _that _hard.

"Physical violence is not tolerated at the breakfast table, Miss Bell." She looked at Fred, "Mr. Weasley, five points from Gryffindor for antagonising the poor girl."

Fred dropped his hand and hung his head for a second, but from the angle I was sitting at, I could see the cheeky grin on his face. As soon as McGonagall was gone, he looked up at me and grinned, somewhat apologetically, before laying his hand gently on my arm.

"Milady, I ask for your forgiveness in what I believe was a grave misunderstanding… for I merely meant you have a lovely cat in Elf, your joyously happy kitten." I smiled at him for a second, and then frustration took over.

"Fred." I groaned and slammed my head down onto my forearms, trying to block out the cheeky grin, the charming nature and the happy, incredibly attractive smile that all belonged to _Frederick William Fabian Weasley_. "You make me suicidal, you know that?"

"All part of the plan, milady." He winked, ran his fingers lightly over my forearm and rose, taking his books off the table and shoving them in his bag, before dashing off to Transfiguration, or whatever the group had now, and left me on my own, head down, staring into the shiny, grey stone floor of the Great Hall.

I didn't move for nearly an hour and a half - I had a double free period that morning, and I just couldn't bring myself to _go_ anywhere to get anything done. Fred was playing on my mind - something I'd tried to get used to over the past six months, because I knew I was in love with him… well, I thought I was, I just needed to work out _why _and I'd be there.

Sighing, I got up when the bell rang for break and went up to the common room, grabbing my book bag and hoping I could get down to Herbology before the crush. As usual, I was too slow, and ended up fighting against the millions of first and second years who seemed to actually _try _to get in my way and make me fall on my arse, or worse, into the trick step.

As usual, they managed to shove me into that sodding step. Irritated, I folded my arms, huffed and stood alone for the best part of fifteen minutes as the crowd dispersed and the staircases took the liberty of moving into another part of the castle. Eventually, frustration got the better of me, and I leaned over the banisters to try and find someone to help me.

The flash of red hair was visible from three flights up and my stomach did a happy little flip as I realised exactly who it could be. Then I realised the decade of humiliation which would probably ensue from his rescue effort, and weighed up whether it was worth it - I mean, I did have potions next.

"Oi! Weasley!" I knew I was risking something by shouting down to him, because I wasn't sure which one it was, but I could see his hair from here, and I didn't know if he was coming up or down the staircase… and there was nobody else around.

I sighed as I realised it was Fred sprinting up the stairs, the usual, idiotic, stupid, inane grin plastered onto his gorgeous face as he looked up at me.

"Mr. Weasley." I nodded lightly and he smiled again.

"Yes, milady," He knelt before me, took my hand and kissed it. "I heard your summons and was immediately drawn to your voice." He dropped my hand and his voice and laughed lightly, "How can I be of service today?" I looked down at the step, then back up at him, went pink and looked to the floor once more.

"I'm umb-ble-gle-bul-tre-stuh." I mumbled something unintelligible, because even though he could see exactly what my problem what, I didn't want him to know that I'd not been looking where I was going and managed to get stuck in the stupid prank step that even the first-week-first-years managed to avoid.

"Sorry, darling, I think I missed that." He patted the top of my head and I felt myself sink a little bit deeper - both into the step and into the feeling that I needed him there to keep me insane. "Little louder this time, if you would."

"I'm stuck in the trick step." I murmured, feeling myself flushing red. I didn't need him to be taking the piss right now. I was embarrassed enough as it was. I didn't need the guy who I would gladly spend the rest of my life with, to stand there and mock me for my lack of care or attention. I just needed to be rescued.

"Well, I can see that, milady." He said with every air of _'duh'_, "Do you require some form of assistance?" He grinned and released my hand, jumping the step to stand over me on the one above it. "I do believe I could be your knight in shining armour, and rescue you from your entrapment… if you so wished?"

I smiled and nodded, blushing bright pink and smiling up at him.

"Yes, please." I managed to whisper, and within a second he was crouching slightly and looking into my eyes.

"Close your eyes, Katie." He said softly, "And let me put my arms around you-" he reached around my waist and held me tight, resting his head on my shoulder for a minute.

"_Always_." I heard myself murmuring. I felt his arms tense around me - my lips were by his ear, I should have expected him to hear. He pulled back a little and frowned at me for a moment, then gave me a soft smile that I had never seen on his lips before. The moment was gone a second later and he returned to the position we had been in less than a minute before.

"Okay, up you come, love." I smiled to myself at the term as he lifted me straight out of the step, holding me in the air for a few moments longer, _a few moments too long_, then set me down on the stair above the one he was standing on. He released me and I sat down on the polished marble, looking at the floor. "You alright, milady?"

"Hmm." I nodded slightly, staring at my undone shoelace, but wouldn't look up at him. I just couldn't bear to face him at that moment. Then, suddenly, he was sitting next to me, his arm slung across my shoulders, playing with the strap on my bag, and the other wrapped around my front, his hands locked together over my upper-right-arm. He held me tight for a few minutes, then the bell rang for third lesson and I realised I needed to be down in the grounds within thirty seconds. "I-um…" I looked up and locked eyes with my best friend in the world, and he gave me that soft, incredible smile again.

"Enjoy Herbology, milady." He said softly, then leaned forward and gave me a really strong hug.

"Thank you for rescuing me, Sir Weasley." I whispered into his ear, then drew back and grinned at him, "I may call upon your services at another time."

"'Course, Milady." He leaned forward and kissed my cheek, and I think I may have melted inside. "Any time."

He released my from the hug, and I swung my bag back over my shoulder, jumped over the trick step and legged it down six flights of stairs, only just making it down to the Herbology Greenhouses as the second bell rang.

In the middle of lesson, I realised that I was still flushed bright pink as I took notes, and hadn't taken my eyes off the honking daffodil in front of me for a second. Cormac nudged me as I dragged my gaze over to Professor Sprout and I looked at him, totally confused.

"You look like you've been drinking Firewhiskey." He murmured into my ear, "You feeling alright?"

"I-uhm…" I felt my face heating up further and sunk deeper into my white-plastic-chair. "Yeah, I'm alright, Cor'. Just a bit warm."

_Oh! And there was the fact that my best friend had done something totally unexpected and kissed me, on the cheek… but still… A kiss is a kiss, right?_

_**Fred**_

I bunked third and was considering bunking fourth lesson as well. It was only Divination; nobody would really care, would they?

I didn't want to go anywhere, and I didn't want to do anything. I'd just had Katie Bell sitting there, letting me hold her tight… and I'd let her go. _Fuck me, I was an idiot. _

"Oi, Fred!" I looked up and realised I'd been sitting on the same step for the past hour, and my arse was getting numb. "Are you coming to fourth?" Lee was lugging his books up the stairs from whatever we'd had third, "Where were you for Charms? Flitwick was worried."

"Didn't feel like it." I shrugged lightly, "Can't really be bothered with fourth. Trelawney, man…" I shuddered and shook my head, "Nah." I stood up and shook my legs out, trying to regain feeling before pins and needles set in.

"You alright? Normally after three sentences you've told four or five jokes." He grinned widely, but I could see the concern in his eyes, "Is it her?" I hadn't exactly told him who the girl I liked… fancied… _loved_ was. I was pretty sure that as soon as I said it, he'd tell Angelina, who'd tell Alicia, and they'd gang up and tell Katie. George knew, but he'd promised, on pain of losing his left-arse-cheek that he'd not tell a soul.

"Yeah." Because I wasn't entirely sure where I stood now. Katie had just displayed her extremely vulnerable side to me, and I'd let _that_ smile show. I knew which one it was, the one that made me seem so soft and gentle - the one that I reserved for the times I watched her when she'd fallen asleep in the common room, or she was doing her work, and swearing about it, and not being able to get any of it done right, and asking me for help, and I was all-too-happy to help. "It's her."

"I-" The bell cut off his next sentence and he looked torn between staying here and helping me work it all out, and maintaining his perfect attendance record by bolting off to Divination. "You want me to hang?"

"Nah, mate." I smiled, trying to suppress a feeling I didn't know existed, a twisted amalgam of love, hope, excitement, fear, dread and nausea, and looked up at him, "Go on, I'll be here, worrying about life, the universe, and-"

"Everything in it." He laughed, and turned away from me for a second, making ready to go up the stairs. "Huzzah for your princess, Fred." He grinned, again, and in that second, I wondered if he knew who I was talking about a few moments ago.

"Huzzah." I returned the words half-heartedly and he smiled, nodded and walked away.

I spent the next hour doing exactly the same as I had done the first - sitting on the third step up, staring into space and praying nobody else found me, while my arse went numb and started to tingle, and my head span with thoughts of what _"Always" _meant to Katie, and whether she really could like me like I liked her.

Sighing as I realised it was probably lunch, I got up and made my way to the passageway down to the kitchens. I didn't really want to be around anyone at the moment - I had things to think through and didn't want to have to consider seeing her and blurting out something stupid as soon as I looked into her eyes.

"Mister Wheezy!" I closed my eyes and grinned, after four years, that never got old. George and I had been on the run from Filch when we'd come this way, tickled the pear and found our way into a room filled with House-Elves and food on tap. We'd been wheezing with laughter as we'd burst into the room, and completely unable to pronounce our surnames. Indeed, the Elves were still pretty clueless when we'd regained our composure - so instead of the Weasley twins, down here, we were collectively known as the Wheezy twins.

I quite liked it to be honest.

"Hello, Edlyn!" I grinned at the female elf that was tugging at the denim just above my knees, "How are you?"

"I'm good," She nodded and pulled me over to the table, "We has the perfect foods for you, Mister Wheezy!" She squeaked, and I was immediately presented with butterbeer and cream cakes, jam sandwiches and crisps, "Where's's Misses Bell?" I looked at her, she was frowning with her big wide eyes and crooked nose, "She's's always with you when you comes to see us!"

"Uh…" I blushed, wondering if I really spent that much time hanging out with Katie. _Of course you did, moron, you're her best friend, and you want to __**be **__with her, you're going to do special stuff like bring her here, aren't you? Bloody Ass._

"Has you had an argument?" Another of the elves asked, and all of a sudden they were all staring at me. "She has just ordered some chips for lunch…" He frowned slightly, and then went to prepare them.

"No…" I shook my head violently, "I'm just… thinking…" There was a short pause, and I thought of something to make her smile. "Hey!" I called to the elf making her chips, "Can you put a Jam sandwich on her plate as well?" he gave me a strange look as I asked, but complied with my wishes.

"Why would you do that?" Edlyn asked quietly.

"She might like it."

They all smiled at me and let me have lunch in peace, then, as the bell rang for fifth and I heard the thundering of footsteps above me, I looked at the elves, rose and smiled.

"Thanks, guys… I'd better go." I nodded and left as they shouted goodbyes to me.

I realised that I had last lesson free - thankfully, because usually I'd be brain-dead by now, after an hour of divination and then lunch, and was halfway into a jump for joy, until I realised that to get back to the common room would mean passing by Flitwick's office, then McGonagall's.

I wondered what Katie would think if she heard that I'd bunked because of her. I mean, she was the sort of person that didn't do things on a whim, who had to think about things and go about them responsibly, and if she had bunked two lessons thinking about me… I'd be worried I was jeopardising her education. She'd feel so guilty, and responsible, and-

Suddenly, I felt I should be responsible - for once in my life - and go and explain to her why I didn't turn up to my lessons.

"Uh, professor?" I knocked twice, and then pushed the door open. She was marking our essays, and by the looks of it, trying to decipher the utter bullshit George had written at the breakfast table this morning.

"Mr. Weasley." She didn't look pleased to see me - then again, she never did. "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Thought I should come and tell you I bunked third and fourth." She looked at me for a long second, and I don't think she realised her mouth had fallen open. "You're staring, Prof."

"Two things, Weasley. One, don't call me Prof. and two… I-I'm stunned."

"Why, Professor? I generally bunk at least one lesson a week, usually Divination. No need to be stunned-"

"But you'd never admit it, Weasley." She frowned and stared at me again, "What's wrong? Did professor Snape threaten to poison you again?"

"No… I just… thought I should tell you." I bowed my head and waited for the detentions to fall.

"Thirty…" She looked at me for a longer moment, trying to decide something. Thirty nights of detention with Filch, or Snape? Most probably the latter, but even if- "Thirty points from Gryffindor for missing both lessons."

"What?" I looked at her again, frowning. "No detentions? No letters to mum?"

"Do you want one?" I shook my head no, and went to ask for an explanation, but she held her hand up to silence me, "You came and admitted you'd done wrong. Clearly something's playing on your mind, Mr. Weasley." She smiled at me, and I was struck by how kind she could really be. "Thank you for telling me."

I nodded, still completely confused, and left her to continue deciphering George's shit handwriting, closing the heavy door behind me as I took a deep breath and grinning like a lunatic. Being responsible and owning up for my actions? Makes a change, but it actually did me some good.

Maybe I could get my princess after all.

_**Katie**_

I wandered up for my free fifth feeling genuinely depressed and a little bit desperate. Fred hadn't been around at lunch, and I was genuinely wondering whether it had been his little encounter with me that had made him skip his favourite meal of the day, _and _his third and fourth lessons.

Lee said he'd been with him for a couple of minutes between them, and he seemed a little bit dejected, a little bit confused and a lot dazed, and that he wouldn't really say why, but I had a horrific feeling that it was because of me.

_Stupid me with my stupid uncontrollable stupid feelings and stupid brain with a stupid connection to my stupid mouth._

"Alright, Katie? You look like Fred did. Dazed and confused."

"Ah, I'm alright." I managed to breathe, looking down at the chips on my plate. I'd wanted something hot for lunch, and these were pretty good, though for some reason, they'd appeared with a jam sandwich on the side of the plate. I sat and looked at it for a long minute, then shifted it over, onto a napkin and folded it away, taking a bite out of it, but keeping the rest for Fred for later.

I dug into the soft chips, they were well-made and practically melted in my mouth, but I quickly realised that it was a mistake to think that I could solve any major problem just with potatoes.

"Katie?" I looked up at Lee, who had Arithmancy with Angelina next, and George and Alicia, who were probably heading to the unused broom cupboard on the fourth floor corridor, second on the right.

"Yeah?"

"You're free now… Fred has it as well, doesn't he?" I nodded, "Well, would you ask him if he's alright?"

"Yeah." I nodded, "I'll have a word with him, and see…"

"Thanks, Kitty." Lee grinned at me and I nodded and went off to the common room, being careful to miss the trick step as I jumped over it - the staircase had shifted back to the seventh floor corridor, and for that I was thankful, as I wasn't in the mood to walk up to the fifth floor, cross the corridor, and then take three extra flights up to the astronomy tower, cross the… _argh_. It was making my legs hurt just thinking about it.

I stood in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady for a couple of minutes; sure I would be faced with a furious, irritating or determined-to-humiliate-me Fred as soon as I muttered the password to the portrait before me. I took a couple of breaths to steel myself and tried to forget the things that were going on in my head, tried to remember what I was supposed to say, to work out exactly how to apologise to him for making him kiss me… _Still, _I reasoned, _he had kissed me without warning, actually, and I hadn't exactly asked for it, but still, if he'd been bunking lessons because of me, something about our exchange must have affected him, to change him from being my knight in shining armour…_

"Fizzing Whizzbee." I said to the portrait. She nodded and swung open, and I was met, thankfully, by an empty common room. I ran up to our dormitory, threw my books into my trunk and sat down on my bed, letting out a frustrated growl. I'd apologise. That's what I'd do.

I forced myself to my feet and stepped down the stairs, taking the long route to my favourite armchair and throwing myself dramatically across it, so my legs dangled off one arm, my head was pillowed by the other arm and I was lying, essentially…

_On the floor. _

"Who did that?" I hadn't noticed someone was sitting on the chair and as I looked up, I let out a squeak of surprise and scrambled to my feet.

"Well, well, well, Milady," I groaned inwardly, "You didn't have to throw yourself at me to get my attention, you know." He was grinning as he held out his hand and pulled me up to my feet again. "Did you require Sir Weasley's assistance once more, Lady Bell?"

"Oh…" I groaned audibly and his kind smile was replaced by a genuine look of concern.

"Katie, you don't look so-"

"I'm alright; I just didn't expect to be…" I didn't want to say it… I didn't want to say it… _oh bugger it_. "Thrown into your path so suddenly, Fred."

"Oh," He grinned, "Thought you weren't so pleased to see me-"

"Fred," I smiled and sat on the couch opposite him - not as comfortable, but it'd do for now, "I'm always happy to see you."

He laughed, but his eyes were the stormy colour that was a mix between green and blue - the colour his eyes went when he was hurt or upset.

"What's up?" I said after a few minutes of just watching him watch me, "Lee said you'd skipped out on third and fourth period."

"Yeah," He nodded, "And I sort of had lunch in the kitchens." He looked down at the floor and grinned as he scuffed the stones with his foot.

"Wh-why?" I frowned and reached forward to take his hand. "Fred… what's bothering you? You've got to tell me-"

"It's nothing, Katie, really." I looked at him as he dragged his eyes up to meet mine, as though it was a chore, as though he was bored of the conversation, "I just need to think for a bit."

He got up, smiled that stupidly soft smile at me, and went to go up to his dormitory.

_**Fred**_

I nearly fucking made it. I had my foot in the air to put it on the first step and her voice made me miss it and trip.

"I call Bullshit." She said, and it stunned me. I turned to look at her and saw she had a fucking scowl on her face as well. Merlin, I actually wanted to get rid of it. I wanted to hug her and kiss her and tell her it was all going to be fine.

I wanted to hug her and kiss her.

_I wanted_ to _hug_ her and _kiss_ her.

_Fred Weasley wanted his Katie Bell. _I swallowed and looked at her longer, and I think she was a little perturbed by the insistence of my gaze.

"Katie?" I said. "What exactly are you calling?"

"You." She said, drawing herself up to her full height. She was five-foot-seven, but I was six-foot-two. She didn't intimidate me at all. Still, I thought I should listen to her for a minute or so, and then I'd catch her out, either verbally, or I'd snog her. Her decision. "You're not alright, so don't pretend to be."

"You've always been able to read me, Katie." I said, and to be honest, I hadn't planned to let it out of my mouth.

_Stupid me with my stupid uncontrollable stupid feelings and stupid brain with a stupid connection to my stupid mouth._

"I know." She stepped forward and touched my cheek lightly, "What's wrong, Fred?"

I considered it for five seconds. Did I tell her outright? Did I think I could cope with her knowing? I thought I should just let my mouth run with whatever my brain really wanted.

"It's… well, it's you." _Shit. Shit shit-itty shit-shit, shit. _

"What?" She jerked her hand down from my face and her mouth dropped open. "Fred, I-"

"No, Katie, listen." I reached out and touched her cheek this time, exactly where I had kissed it three hours before. "Please…" Her fingers reached up and tugged my hand down from her skin, locking my fingers with hers in a single, fluid moment. "You confuse me."

"Sorry?"

"I said, you confuse me. So much, Katie." I repeated the words and stepped closer again, "You attract me, and confuse me, and make me want you, and-" She licked her lips and looked at me.

"Shut up, Fred." She said simply, and proceeded to look at me, without speaking, for about two minutes. It went on for the longest time, until she took another step forward and I could feel her chest pressing against mine. "Because to be honest with you, you totally confuse me, make me want you and completely attract me too."

My fingers found the strands of hair that were pressing against her lips, that had whipped around her face as she had stumbled to her room fifteen minutes ago. They brushed them away and I looked down into her eyes, realising I did not find that position comforting at all. I stepped back toward the steps and she followed me, her hand still entwined with mine.

"Wha-"

"Stand there." I said, pointing at the bottom step.

"You're insane." She said, but with a raised eyebrow from me, I complied and I found that her lips were in an altogether more attractive position. I pulled her close and she frowned slightly, and her lips parted in a gasp as she realised what I was going to do. "You don't mind, do you?"

"Course not." She breathed, the exhaled air making my bottom lip tingle.

"Good." I pressed my lips to hers and felt my mind go absolutely blank, knowing there was very little else to worry about as long as I had her to keep me insane.

I let her go after a full minute, and she stumbled back, almost refusing to break away from my gaze. I caught her wrist and pulled her back to me, so we were pressed against each other and her lips were only a few inches away from mine once more.

"Katie-" George and Alicia had just burst through the portrait hole, and Alicia's voice rang through the common room. I turned to look over my shoulder; they were standing hand in hand.

"Hey, Sir Weasley?" Her lips were right beside my ear, and I tingled as her breath licked at my ear. I smiled to myself, that soft smile I reserved only for her. _Her smile, _I decided_. _

_Her smile, and hers only._

"Yes, Milady?" I turned to look at her again.

"Can I get a lift?" She said, and I looked at her, a little confused. "Piggy-back, you dolt."

I burst out laughing, and her loud giggles joined mine. I turned back and she wrapped her arms around my shoulders, pulling me close so she could jump onto my back. As she wrapped her legs around my middle, her lips came forward and kissed the skin and scruff on my jaw line, and I grinned, turning my head so she could kiss my lips.

_I was going to quite enjoy being her knight in shining armour._

**-x-x-x-**

_**A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed that one!**_

_**Please review so I know!!**_

_**Love ya**_

_**xxx**_


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